Anyone who knows me well enough knows one of my favorite sayings is for God to help me forgive someone who has hurt me and to react to the particular person(s) in kindness because its like heaping hot coals on their heads. :)
I sometimes do this and need to check my motives (is it out of spite or out of love) that I react kindly (just sayin'). But, as I think about those who have hurt us in the church, I strangely feel compassion and sadness for them. As much as I want to be angry (and I do have my moments), I don't settle at anger. I hurt for them as they do not understand what they do. I am always learning how to respond in a Christ-like manner, sometimes I do better than other times. My anger is more directed at the hurt they cause other people, because it does not become the body of Christ. Acting any other way than as Christ tells us to is sin. Purposely saying things to hurt others and/or lead others away from Christ is sin. Yet, we are still called to forgive. God, help me forgive.
Romans 12:14-21 "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion. Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. Therefore “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.